Journey to Love

Chapter Forty-two

A Jumbo Midget

by Sequoyah

Edited by Cole, Peter and Scott



The car was so out of place that I was immediately suspicious. Anyone with business at the clinic would not be driving a luxury automobile. Even if they owned one, they would pick a better mode of transportation. The fact that even at a distance I could see the car had dense -- black -- window tinting did not make me feel less nervous. I went into the clinic from the back, to avoid being seen, and shook Richard awake. Thank God, a touch and Richard was immediately awake. I quickly explained my cocern and he agreed we best prepare for someone up to no good. “Radio Kathryn and tell her to stay put.” I called Kathryn and she, as Richard had been, was immediately awake. I guess being a soldier and a doctor on call conditioned you to be awake and on your feet in an instant. I quickly explained the situation and told her to stay put. She offered no argument. I had soon learned when someone told you to stop, be quiet, don’t move, etc., you did. Often your life depended on it. The desert could be dangerous as well as beautiful.


Richard said, “This may well involve Jayden.” He quickly covered Jayden with a sheet and wheeled him into the surgery. Richard stationed me at the reception desk and disappeared after saying, “I've got you covered.”


The car finally reached the clinic and the driver got out and opened the back door. A small man, dressed to the teeth, stepped out. I couldn't help but notice he was wearing cowboy boots with soles and heels which must have added almost an inch to his height but, even at that, I doubted he was five feet tall. He had a swagger like he was John Wayne as he approached the clinic. When he walked in, I said, “Good afternoon, sir. How can I help you?”


“You have Jayden Fulton here,” a statement, not a question.


“I don't believe I know you,” I responded. “I am Derek Wilson.”


“I don't give a fuck who you are. I am here for Jayden Fulton.”


“I'm sorry, sir, whether or not Mr. Fulton is in this clinic is not information I am free to release unless you are a family member. May I see some identification?”


“You can go to hell! Sammy!” he yelled at the top of his lungs.


The driver came rushing into the clinic. “Yes sir?”


“Find Jayden, then come and take care of this smartass.” With those words, the little man turned and walked out of the clinic.


“Asshole, if you know what's good for you, you'll deliver Jayden now. Show me where he is,” the driver, I guess Sammy, snarled.


I didn't move, so he grabbed me by the arm, yanked me from the chair and shoved me ahead of him through the door to the examining rooms and surgery. After looking in the second examining room and finding it empty, he slapped me across the face, hard, and said, “If you don't want more of that and worse, show me Jayden... What the fuck?”


“I suggest you very slowly put your hands on top of your head and get down on the floor.” The driver started to turn around and Richard said, “This is a gun in your back. You turn around and you're dead.” The driver finally did as he was told and Richard had me tape his hands together behind his back. I used almost a whole roll of tape, then did the same with his feet. “Take him into an examining room and start an IV of saline. We'll give it a while to work, then question him. We get some answers, we'll stop his IV so he'll recover, otherwise we'll let the chemical do its job. We'll drive the car over a cliff and bury the two of them out in the desert -- rid the world of two pieces of trash.”


We rolled him onto a lowered gurney and lifted it up. “Blindfold him, then restrain him.” Richard appeared with an IV bag of saline as I finished. He inserted the needle and set the IV for a slow drip. The bag had not been warmed, so it felt very cold entering the bloodstream. “You'll start to feel something cold entering your bloodstream,” Richard said. “That's the NaCl solution. We'll give you fifteen or twenty minutes before we are ready to question you. The chemical will help keep you from lying, but its main result will be to elevate your blood pressure. That gets too high and you'll have a stroke. You'll determine how high it goes. We get answers, you get something to drop the blood pressure. It's up to you.”


“You don't kill me, Big Walt will have it done.”


“And just who is Big Walt?”


“The man in the car.”


“Oh,” Richard laughed, “it's like jumbo shrimp. Does Big Walt have a last name? You have one?” The driver did not answer. Richard took the wallet from his jacket and said, “Sammy Davis Junior Akins”


“My mom loved Sammy Davis,” he shrugged.


“I’ll take him away. You man the desk.”


I went back to the front desk and waited. It was twenty minutes before the little man came in. “Where's Sammy?” he demanded. I really expected his voice to crack.


“Sammy?” I asked innocently.


“You know damn well who I'm talking about, Dickhead. Where is he?”


“Your driver went back to the examining rooms, oh, twenty or so minutes ago.”


He immediately started yelling “Sammy, Sammy,” at the top of his lungs. “Fuckface, you better produce Sammy in two minutes or you're dead meat.”


“Fine,” I said, got up and headed to the examining rooms.


“Hold it! You're not going by yourself. Just walk ahead of me very slowly.” Big Walt took a pistol from his jacket and it pointed at me. “Okay, move.”


I did as I was told and as soon as I stepped into the hall, Richard yanked me to one side and gave Big Walt's arm a chop on the wrist of the hand holding the gun. The gun went off and I felt something slam into the side of my head. It hurt like hell. “Richard, I'm shot!”


“Must be a ricochet. You're bleeding, but standing. Let's get this little guy all situated and then I'll look at it. You'll find some children's tape in the cabinet in the next room. Grab some child's restraints as well.” Big Walt was red with rage, blood vessels on his neck and forehead looked ready to burst. “Hey, don't stroke out on us. We're not finished with you. Bring him one of those children's acetylsalicylic acid tablets as well. I'm afraid he may stroke out on us.”


I brought tape and restraints and we soon had Big Walt in the same shape as his driver and placed him in the second examination room. I offered him the children's aspirin and a glass of water. He refused at first, but when I said, “Take it or leave it. It's your blood pressure.” He took it.


I went back to the emergency room and Richard took care of my wound. “A ricochet creased your head. I need to shave it and probably put in a few stitches. Our guests can wait.” Richard worked quickly and fifteen minutes later was finished.


We both headed for the first examining room where we greeted Sammy again. Before we went in, Richard radioed the tribal police and described the situation to them. He left the radio on when we entered the room and flipped on the tape recorder used to record Kathryn’s or Richard’s comments as they attended to a patient. “How're you feeling, Sammy?”


“I'm freezing.”


“Take his blood pressure,” Richard said and when I did it was, of course high since the IV was adding volume and salt to his system. To make things seem worse, I added ten points when I spoke after giving Richard the numbers by hand signal. “He's at one sixty-five over a hundred and rising.”


“Normal is one twenty over eighty. Stroke level one seventy over a hundred and five. Pushing the limits here, but, hey, a stroke is death by natural causes. Are you ready to talk, Sammy?”


“Who's going to protect me from Big Walt?”


“You need protection from that shrimp?” I asked.


“You saw what he did to Jayden. Had you not fucked up the plan by finding him, he would be just bones out there on the desert.”


“That midget beat Jayden like that? I don't believe it.”


“Of course he didn't do it personally, but he was there and instructed one of his boys to do it.”


“How do you know?”


“I was there.”


“Tell us about it.”


Sammy described in great detail how Jayden had told Big Walt he was no longer hustling for him. He said Jayden, and most of those in Big Walt's stable, were throw-away kids he picked up off the streets of Phoenix. For a while, all Big Walt asked Jayden to do was kiddie porno. Jayden looked younger than his seventeen years especially after liberal application of hair remover. Coupled with a hairy 'daddy', he became a kiddie porn favorite. After he had done that for almost a year, Big Walt had Jayden working as a prostitute, sucking guys and being sucked. Jayden had refused to get involved in the freely offered drugs and told Big Walt he'd not be fucked nor fuck anyone. One of Big Walt's best-paying customers -- a high-ranking policeman who also protected him and his business -- was at a condo on Lake Powell and called Big Walt and told him he wanted 'a piece of that boy ass.' Big Walt brought him up. He also had a couple of his enforcers to come us as well. “We were all staying in a motel in Page until the policeman had finished with Jayden.”


When Mr. Policeman tried to fuck Jayden he got a tooth knocked out. He called Big Walt who realized Jayden had created a major threat to his empire. We picked up Jayden, an enforcer beat him up and we dumped him in the desert to die. “I drove them all back to Phoenix. The policeman heard Jayden was still alive and Big Walt came here to see that the job was done right.”


When Richard questioned him, Sammy was free with naming names and providing a way for other evidence to be found. As soon as the tribal police heard child porn was involved, the FBI was called and a raid in Phoenix produced DVDs, catalogs, mailing lists and a list of national distributors. Perhaps most shocking to me was Brother Fitzsimmons’ Ministries was one of the distributors. Sammy had finished his tale long before the tribal police showed up, ready to hang Big Walt, and the FBI was not far behind, an agent having helicoptered in. The police took the two away and I didn't think influence in the Phoenix police department would be a lot of help.


With the excitement over, I hoped, I went back to check on Jayden. “Jayden, Big Walt has just been arrested by the FBI and the tribal police. Don't know if you can hear me, but if you can, I know you'll be glad.” Jayden stirred and I reached for his hand and gave it a light squeeze and he squeezed in return. “Hang in there, Jayden. I'll get the doctor.” I ran to find Kathryn and found her and Richard still talking with an FBI agent and the head of the tribal police. “Excuse me, but Jayden is waking up.”


“Is he speaking?” the FBI agent asked. I shook my head.


“And you'll not speak to him when he is until I give the okay. I hope we are clear on that.” Kathryn glared at him.


“Doctor, I wouldn't think of crossing any one of you three,” he laughed. “Besides, we have enough on Big Walt and at least a hundred others to fill a few cells. We have plenty to do, but we will want to speak to Jayden. By the way, do you know his last name?”


“Jayden Marshall Fulton,” the tribal policeman said.


“No numbers after the name?”


“Yeah, I think IV, the fourth.”


“Holy shit, man. Pardon the French, but do you know who Jaden Marshall Fulton the third is? The 'Y' was added to the name for the fourth, but otherwise the same name.”


“Afraid not,” Officer Whitehorse said.


“He's a big-shot from the Gallup area. Running for Congress next year. Presently he's a state senator and the darling of the right wing.”


“So why did he throw away a kid and how will he explain that to voters?” I asked.


“So far no-one's asked.”


Kathryn came back in and said, “Derek, I think you are the one to talk to Jayden. He's still weak and shaky. Special Agent Blackstone, I think it’d be wise if you'd come back tomorrow afternoon or the next day.”




“Is this the new FBI?” Officer Whitehorse asked, puzzled.


Special Agent Blackstone grinned and said, “I wish. No, this is me and my belief that we're in the same boat and can accomplish more together.” He and Officer Whitehorse said goodbye and I went in to see Jayden.


I soon learned Kathryn asked me to talk to Jayden because I was gay. In slow and halting speech with a lot of stops to rest, he talked for half an hour before I suggested he rest and we'd talk more later. In the half hour, I learned his father had found a gay magazine in his bedroom and some gay files on his computer and had given him a pretty good beating and then driven him to Phoenix and put him on the street, just as some do unwanted cats and dogs -- take them far from home and dump them. He had a few dollars, but when those were gone, he panhandled, but got beat up for invading another panhandler's territory. He was standing on a corner when a guy pulled up and offered to give him twenty bucks to let him blow him. He did and although he liked it, felt dirty afterward. His third day on the streets, a guy offered him fifty dollars for a blow job and he decided to take it. When he got in the car and unzipped the guy's pants, he showed him his badge and hauled him in for hustling. He stayed in jail less than two hours before the charges were dropped and he was picked up by Sammy and taken to Big Walt's place. It was at that point I suggested he rest and he was asleep in a couple of minutes.


Over the next three days, Jayden was my responsibility. I fed him, gave him his bath, changed his dressings, checked his vitals. I also had him up and walking on crutches. He had difficulty on the crutches and couldn't walk far, but any distance was great according to Kathryn. I cared for him and I listened. Jayden still spent a great deal of time in bed, but he also spent most of the day sitting in a chair. A few days later, Kathryn changed his cast and really started him working to learn how to use his crutches.


One afternoon, after he had exhausted himself walking, he was sitting in a chair. I was sitting on his bed and Kathryn on a stool and we were talking. Actually, they were talking about their backgrounds. Kathryn was Hopi and Navajo and Jayden was mostly Navajo. His mother was a pure-blood Navajo and his father was three-quarters. Turns out, Jayden's mother secretly taught him about his heritage and the language because his father thought he should be 'one hundred percent American.' “I never figured out what that was,” Jayden laughed, something he was doing more of.


“Know about two-spirited ones?” Kathryn asked. Jayden said he didn't and Kathryn dropped it when Richard came buzzing in. He had gone to Chinle to the Pueblo for the weekend with the idea of getting the wedding planned. He really did want it to happen before I left.


He came in all excited and said, “Things are heating up in Gallup and Phoenix,” and tossed a couple of newspapers in Jayden's lap. One from Gallup had a headline reading, 'Would-be Congressman's Son Beaten by Pimp.' A quarter of the front page was devoted to Jayden being left for dead, the clinic's finding him and our part in breaking up a child porn ring, a gay prostitution ring and corruption in the Phoenix police department. Two stories inside told how Jayden had been put on the street by his father and a second one was about throw-away kids. A Phoenix newspaper focused more on the corruption in the police department and the child porn ring, including a lengthy account of some surprising distributors such as Brother Fitzsimmons. Both newspapers predicted Fulton the third would drop out of the race for Congress soon.


Jayden had been in good shape. “You have to stay in shape if you want customers,” he said sadly when I commented on his physical condition. It was a definite asset in his healing. He was handling crutches well in less than a week and we spent a lot of time together as he rode with me to make calls on people. Where possible, he came along on crutches, otherwise he sat in the Land Rover or in a nice spot outside and read.


He had missed a year of school and so had not graduated in June. I guessed that made him a couple years younger than I was. “I'll be twenty my next birthday,” I said one day, “You're eighteen?”


“Next birthday,” he said, got a stricken look on his face and said, “Yeah, not eighteen and a boy whore.” I didn't know what to say. “No surprise to you, so why the silence?”


I sat in silence for a while longer, looking at the ground. Finally I turned to him and said, “Jayden, you got paid for sex so you could eat and have a roof over your head, then not just to eat, but to stay alive. Don't tell me you didn't have some idea what would happen when you cold-cocked that policeman. Maybe technically it wasn't rape, I'm no lawyer, but to me being forced to have sex is rape and that's what happened to you. You can hate that. You do hate that but, by damn, you don't have permission to hate yourself.”


That opened the floodgates and we talked for over an hour about what had happened to him, how much he hated it and how he now thought of himself as worthless and dirty. We both did a lot of weeping that afternoon. As a result of our spending that time, I was late making my last call and very late getting home. Kathryn and Richard were both very worried about us and after I told them why, both said helping Jayden heal was part of my job. “But remember you do have a radio,” Kathryn said. I was relieved she was not angry.


Jayden's leg was still in a cast, of course, but Richard insisted he could still ride. It was an awkward process, but he was finally able to ride short distances. I noticed he was often assigned to go with me when I had short rides to do. When long rides in a vehicle were involved, he was assigned to Richard. I commented on that to Kathryn and she told me Richard was teaching him about his culture and heritage. Before his mother died, she was teaching him Diné. He was recovering much of what he had learned as he and Richard carried on their conversation in Diné on the longer trips.


The cast on Jayden's arm came off and he began exercising it after four weeks. I had been at the clinic for just over eight weeks. Kathryn suggested we all go to Chinle for the weekend to meet Lupe, check out the Pueblo, visit and relax. Richard said we had reservations at the Holiday Inn. Lupe had managed that for us. She also booked us on a tour of Canyon De Chelly although she or Richard could have taken us since they were Navajo, but we thought a tour would be good and would leave them free to spend time together.


When we arrived, I quickly changed into Speedos and hit the pool. I swam for an hour without stopping and found what I had done for a month had not cut my endurance or speed -- at least I hoped not. Jayden was impressed as were Richard and Lupe. They had arrived early for dinner and sat by the pool with Jayden and Kathryn.


After dinner, the two left for the Pueblo and Kathryn invited Jayden and me to her room for refreshment and to watch a movie. Since Chinle is on the reservation, there is no alcohol available, but Kathryn had brought a cooler. “Want a beer, Jayden?” She asked as she handed me one.


“I guess,” Jayden replied. “I never had beer. My johns were always into liquor.” Kathryn handed him a beer and I put out snacks she had brought.


We fell to talking and Jayden and I talked about when we realized we were gay and how we had coped with it. We both had buried ourselves in the closet until something happened. For me it had been good. I had been rescued by my dads and given a dream life. Jayden had been sent into a living hell by his father.


After we had talked about that for a while Kathryn said, “Jayden, I have been thinking about your future. I called a lawyer in Phoenix and he thinks he can get some money for all of your abuse by Big Walt. He's working on it. Whether or not he comes through with money, Richard, Lupe and I have talked and we think a year at the Pueblo would serve you well. You could catch up with school and graduate, as well as learn about your culture and heritage and have time to heal physically and emotionally. Money will be no problem. If you get anything from Big Walt, you can pay your way, otherwise, the three of us will take care of it. Think about that.”


Jayden had made real progress overcoming his emotional trauma from his time on the street and with Big Walt, but I knew he had a long way to go. Physically he was healing well but, again, he still had weeks ahead of him before his leg was fully healed. He seemed deep in thought and finally said, “Thanks, Kathryn, I'll think about it.”


I had asked Richard to try to get two beds in Jayden’s and my room, but it didn't happen. I helped Jayden get out of his clothes and gave him a bath -- he still had the leg cast to deal with -- and in bed before I showered and dressed. When I crawled into bed, I made sure I stayed on my side. “Are you afraid of me, Derek,” Jayden asked.


After thinking for a few moments, I replied, “No, Jayden, I am afraid of me. We have talked about just about everything except a biggie, my relationships.” I told him about Levi and I being fuck buddies and then about my relationship with Wolf. “Jayden, I don't want a fuck buddy relationship again and I don’t want to make the same mistake again as I did with Wolf. I find you very attractive and, whether you know it or not, you are a great person. Add to that I am horny as hell and I don't trust myself with you.”


“Derek, I'm a whore. I sucked off and got sucked off by guys for money -- not that I ever got any of it -- and if you want me to suck you off, I will. If you want to suck me off, that's okay...”


“But it's not okay, Jayden. You are not a whore, you are a wonderful guy and are, I hope, becoming a good friend. That's what counts, that's what's important. I don't want to do anything that will keep us from becoming very good friends.”


“Do you mean that?”




Jayden fell silent and when I turned toward him, I saw tears streaming down his face. My heart went out to him and I threw caution to the wind and reached over and pulled the young man to me, wrapping him in my arms. Jayden wrapped his arms around me and cried his heart out for what seemed like hours, but was probably less than five minutes. I didn't attempt to try to stop him. He was doing what he needed to do. When his sobs stopped, I continued to hold him. Maybe five minutes later, I realized he was asleep.


I moved to a more comfortable position and hoped a more comfortable one for him as well. A light outside illuminated the room like a child's nightlight. I raised myself on an elbow and looked at Jayden sleeping. He looked so peaceful and innocent. In my heart, in spite of his having been a sex toy, he was innocent, a victim, who had to overcome the self-loathing he sometimes expressed. Yes, absolutely, I wanted this man as a friend.



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